“(the woman being tempted, the woman leading the man) that was part of what went wrong in the fall - and part of what was cursed. “
As if it would have been any better if it were Adam to be tempted and lead the woman into sin. You are making an assumption that man is not capable of leading woman into sin by virtue of his manhood. Adam was not deceived, he knew what he was doing, therefore Eve did not lead him into anything he did not already know and agree with. Leading in and of itself is not wrong, it is only wrong when one is leading in error. Also, I have yet to see male headship protect woman from error or deception in a way that a woman is not also capable of protecting her husband from error. Gender alone does not make one more righteous and free from error.
Patriarchy is not primarily about leading woman for her own good, it is a system by which a man exploits a woman for his own gain. It seeks to control a woman’s movement and withhold empowerment from a woman economically and legally so that a man can grow his own wealth, have someone do all of the housework for him, and take the fruit of her womb exclusively for his own gain.